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Tuesdays with Trish, Mother Son Dance

April 2, 2013

As you may know, I have been shooting weddings for quite a while now. In that time I have seen all of the standard wedding traditions so many times, all done by different people but it’s the same ritual and the same emotions. There are so many moments at a wedding that are ‘THE’ moments we can all agree upon as the highlights, the bride coming down the aisle, the vows, the bride and groom coming back down the aisle, their exit from the church, cutting the cake and the bride dancing with her father. But wait, what about the groom dancing with his mother?!?! Yes, it happens but no one would probably mention that as a significant event at a wedding. Unfortunately the mother of the groom is often overlooked, after all it’s the bride’s day and her mother and father are the key players next to the couple actually getting married. I never appreciated or even realized how the mother of the groom might have felt. But that all changed in 2005 when I became a mother to my son Isaac. All of a sudden I found myself photographing the mother/son dance and wiping tears away in between shots. What I had not realized before this time is just how emotional it is to be a mom and to love a child so much. I have heard many people say that when your daughter gets married you gain a son but when your son gets married you lose a son. I really hope that is not true! But what I do know is true is that there is a special relationship between a mother and son that is very different than that of the daughter and father, and although it is not glamorized nearly as much, it’s equally important and special. So if you see my bawling my eyes out during the mother /son dance at the next wedding you will know why, because someday that will be me out there gripping on to my son for dear life and thinking back on all of the joy (and challenges) of raising him and not wanting to let him go. But also being proud of the man he will have become and wanting him to go forward and live a good life. He is only 7 now but recently selected the song that we would dance to at his wedding… “Your My Best Friend” by Queen. Already crying…


  1. Jennifer Darling Durant says:

    very nicely written… now I’m all teary eyed too!

  2. Marisa Gerena says:

    beautifully said, I too feel the same way as I have a son.

  3. Barbara Westlake says:

    Oh My!

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